The Chemical Peel

I couldn't be another holistic health so and so titling a blog, "Green Your Routine"...I'd have to slit my throat - and I'm hella busy and ain't nobody got time for that....
So, "The Chemical Peel" it is!

What I'm talking about today is peeling away at that onion of our traditional beauty routine...ridding ourselves of the toxicity that exists in so many mainstream products out there and finding a better way to stay sassy!  It's become something of an obsession of mine lately, when a few small efforts to make my regimen more au naturele yielded some divine results.  I was hooked and now I want more.  It's just like when I started watching The L Word and everyone thought I was a lesbian. Sort of.

below are some of my new necessities that...oh..fuck it,.... "green my routine":

• Organic Virgin Coconut Oil~

When I was in Santa Barbara this summer for my best friend's wedding (JULIA ROBERTS! JINX!) I noticed her sister dipping into a jar of coconut oil and using it as moisturizer.  I had heard tell of this but never saw real people putting it into play and my best friends sister is really pretty.  Like, really pretty. So naturally, I had that moment of, "if I use that maybe I will also have huge boobs and no stomach!".  Sadly...my breasts remain large...and my belly remains in charge.  BUT...well, BUTT, cellulite has noticeably stopped waging war on my soul and thighs and I shave less.  I used to have to shave my legs like every five seconds, I would step out of the shower and magically grow an inch of hair-I was a yeti.  But now, I'm more of a chia pet and I can get away with 2 days razor free and that's monumental.  The other thing I love about coconut oil is that a little goes a long way so one jar will likely see you through a very long period of time where as you generally have to replenish your moisturizer monthly,which can get costly- not to mention the fact that it basically works on EVERYTHING. In addition to moisturizer, it has also replaced those incredibly expensive (not to mention toxic) eye make up remover pads I used to buy constantly.  A little dab of coconut oil on a cotton ball or qtip and, "I'm a pretty girl, Mama".

But the best benefit without a doubt, is that when you use something all natural like coconut oil to cleanse and moisturize you're nourishing your skin - not filling open pores with toxic, cancer causing chemicals. And that's lovely because I don't know about you, but I'm le tired of le cancer.

• Jonathan Product Adds Moisture Conditioner/TJ MAXX~

This one's a double whammy.  TJ Maxx has been long adored by my friends and I and long loathed by my husband and our checking account.  I find things we never knew we needed there- hot pink velvet clothes hangers, ottomans, and most importantly tons of designer products for a fraction of the price (do you hear me calling, TJ?? Make me your next Maxxinista, immediately)!  When I stumbled upon Jonathan Product for $7 f'ing bucks during my last pilgrimage, I gasped loudly and immediately text the photographic evidence to my sister.  We were devotees of Jonathan's during the Bravo BLOWOUT days. A reality tv epic that stole our hearts and made us long for a male hairdresser to call our own, but even if we couldn't have Jonathan, at least we could have his products. Jonathan's products are, "FREE of sulfates, parabens, phthalates, gluten and mineral oil. 100% vegan*  Everything your hair needs, nothing it doesn't"  I love this product- but oddly not as a conditioner.  Ya know what I use this for?  That's right. The yeti leg hair!  This is so soothing to my sensitive, irish gams - and just like da coconuts, a little Jonathan goes a long way. That sounds kinda dirty. And I like it.

• A Fiercely, Functional Haircut

One thing I strive to teach my children, (Savannah and the kiddens) is that some costly purchases are well worth the investment. Chanel Sunglasses, DVF luggage, cashmere, and of course, your hair.  Even when I was a poor, college co-ed (adored by Manhattan Real Estate Brokers, FDNY, NYPD and a train conductor or two) I was always sure to set aside $5 to buy my first drink every weekend, and about $250 to maintain clean ends and the perfect honey blonde every 2 months.  Never let it be said that I didn't have my priorities in order.

When you have the right stylist and colorist it can solve a shit ton of problems but when the person maintaining your coif has you coming and going every few weeks because you wash your hair once and see roots then you are being played.  If your color is smart and your cut is sassy you can make it last and save some dough.  My Colorist, Miki, from Thunder Salon in Philadelphia is so choice.  I literally want to be her.  I not only look forward to our visits because there is a La Calombe coffee right next door, but more so because Miki is as delightful as she is talented ....and that's a whole lotta delight.  I have walked in there pre-menstrual and begging for change and Miki has talked me down and found the right low lights that give me enough of an update without dyeing it fire engine red as I am apt to initially proclaim I want to do.  (Miki also cuts beautifully!) Thunder Salon 110 South 19th Street  Philadelphia, PA 19103
(215) 563-2665

And then there is my Stylist.  Yes, I'm a hair hopper.  I go one place for color and one place for cut.  This is right for me you guys, and everyone's in the loop so no need to call Maury.

For my cut I go to Jenna at Verde Salon.  Jenna makes me want to write a Lifetime movie called, "My Stylist;My Lover".  She is like a unicorn with scissors and is perhaps the one stylist I feel like I could say, "do whatever you want" and I know I would be  happy with anything she created.  I used to be a lunatic about my hair...I mean it's still my thing but I now can leave the house with a wet head and not feel like its the apocalypse. And I'm sure that's also a result of much emotional work, meditations and affirmations but it's also because Jenna gives me a cut that no matter what I do, air dry, curl, straight, put it up- it looks good.  It's wild.  And that's how it should be.  She tells me the truth and doesn't talk me into $750 worth of shit I don't need.  Jenna don't play like that. And neither do I.  We are soul mates.  http://verdesalon.com/

• The Pits

OK.  Now don't judge me for this. But I don't shave my armpits anymore.  Well...I do.  But like once every two weeks.  When we shave we are opening up our pores in a serious way.  How many of you shave your pits and then promptly douse on antiperspirant? Right! I did too.  And I was constantly having violent reactions to the chemicals.  Scratching my armpits until they bled. And feeling pretty lousy in general.  I tried switching to natural deodorants but about 3 hours after I would apply them I would smell like a hoagie and I knew they weren't working.  I had some success with a crystal that you wet with water and rub around there but again....6 hours later...hoagie time.  My alternative?  I stopped shaving.  Not only do I find that this has greatly improved my bodies' chemistry (perhaps the lack of all those chemicals going right into my lymph system) but I sweat less there and the need for deodorant is a dwindling'!    I use a teeny tiny bit maybe once a day- again don't judge- that's all I need.  I shave once every two weeks when I see that look in my Husband's eye that says "I would like to have sex tonight without you keeping your arms at your sides" and that's when I use the rock crystal but the next day when I'm beastly again, a lil dab does me.  Now look, this is all me.  No one told me to do this.  I didn't read about it anywhere.  I don't think there's been any scientific study done to prove that this is good or bad for you.  All I know is the positive effect its had on me physically and emotionally.  I'm a big believer in taking control of your own health and being your own best preventative medicine.  Do what you can....things that can basically only help, not hurt you.  Not shaving my armpits in an effort to prevent chemicals from entering my bod is not hurting me.  And maybe it's helping me.
Now.  Take that look off your face and stop shaving your armpits!

• smelly and safe

No, this is not a follow up to the ballad of the unshaven armpit.  It's more of an ode to the eau.
When I started sifting through my products to see where I could start making changes that really matter it was really hard for me to own up to the idea that my perfume addiction was particularly toxic to my body.  I love perfume and I'm kind of a freak when it comes to it.  I can smell someone and almost instantly know what they're wearing.  But I read this article in my favorite liberal bias media outlet, The Huffington Post and realized sniffing people is not only a fun guessing game but it's probably also giving me cancer. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/samuel-s-epstein/toxic-chemicals_b_625648.html  So, I resolved to make that the next layer taken off on my chemical peel.  Trouble is, it's really hard to find an all natural perfume that doesn't smell like some mix of patchouli and b.o. - that's why during a recent stroll through the health and beauty aisle of the South Street Whole Foods, I was dazzled to snort this, http://www.loveandtoast.com/ ! And even more thrilled when my Husband liked the way it waffed.  We almost never agree on fragrances for me.  I'm my own woman but I always like the idea that the perfume I wear is attractive and seductive to my significant other's senses so this was a total win/win for the Dixons.  Its safe, its smelly, it's sexy.  I lerve it. 


So my little Lymphonistas! That's the beginning...and please let me know how you've started to peel away at the layers of a previously toxic beauty routine! I'd love to hear from you.

Bisous!
JKD